Procrastination

What’s going on? Every time I try and forget about this guy, he somehow just keeps popping back into my head. I decided to stop talking to him 4 days ago. He told me that he wasn’t looking for a relationship and that was it – my mind automatically switched on lock down and prepared to shut him out. I told him that that was it, after the second time he had let me down when we were meant to meet up, but for some reason my mind forced me to pursue. I don’t even really want a relationship. At least I thought I didn’t. How can I not even know what I want but an urge inside me signals a manoeuvre and there I am with a target?

The mind is a mysterious thing. Even though you believe that you have made a decision, your subconscious awakens and tries to change your views. How can one simple dream make me feel completely different? It may be for good reasons or for bad but the score so far is heart 1, mind 0.

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