Note to self: It’s your life

I found this blog post in my drafts from two years ago. I can’t remember what I was going through at the time of writing it, but when I found it, it really resonated with me.

Two years on and I still don’t really know what I want. There have been so many changes, so many people have come and gone in my life, so many new opportunities have been presented, but I still thought this was an essential note to self.

 

Note to self (5th March 2015)

Not everyone in life is going to like you.

Some people may seem like they are there for you. Then in times when you really need them, then they disappear.

You have the power to control your life, follow your dreams and also pick the people you associate yourself with.

There have been times in my life when I have made mistakes. There have been times when I have chosen to go down a certain path which my friends have disagreed with. There have also been times when I have had to drop a lot of people because of certain situations and experiences.

No one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes. That’s one of the most interesting aspects of life.

Forget the “ideal” and the expectations of what individuals should be like. We are all different, individual and unique.In some cases that means sacrificing some things.

I want to know how far you think you should go to chase your dreams and what sacrifices you have been faced with. How far would you go to get what you want from life?

 

 

A Thought On Homelessness

“Could you please spare some change to buy some food?” a grey haired man rings in my ear on the platform of the underground as I bite into my dinner – a pastrami sandwich.

“I’m sorry, I don’t have anything” I reply, whilst contemplating if it is worth giving him the pennies at the bottom of my bag or giving up my meal. The thought that it is illegal to beg or to give money to beggars on the underground runs through my mind for a split second.

As he struggles over to others on the platform, stick in hand and vomit smeared on his blue T-shirt,  I look on and wish I could help.

The same thing crossed my mind last week as I sat in the beer garden for yet another leaving drink and saw an elderly grey haired woman about 60 rummaging through the bin. That time, I did give her the last of my change to which my colleague began a debate into if we should actually give money to “these people”.

“She proberly has a council house… why do you think she is in this situation?” His words rang through my ears and made my blood boil.

The reality of the situation is that there are homeless people everywhere – and you can’t help them all. Whilst some are genuine, he was right in saying that a lot of them do in fact have a roof over their head whilst other workers like us work all day to try and afford the rising rent prices in London.

Despite this, obviously the feeling of wanting to help everyone is present. During university I underwent a project to immerse myself with the homeless and learnt that a lot of people on the street are in a no win situation. They can’t get a job because they have no address and even if they try, they are stopped due to their state and appearance – causing them to take drugs to try and escape the reality of the situation.

Homelessness is a rising problem worldwide and many people don’t even bat an eyelid. But what if we could change the perception of homelessness and in fact benefits? Would it make a difference and what would it achieve?

In Two Days…

I could be the luckiest girl in the world.
(Well in my eyes that is.)

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It’s been a long week job-hunting since I left my job – and after going to loads of interviews, I actually managed to nail a particular one at somewhere I REALLY want to work.

Maybe trying to imagine I already have the job will work… I don’t care. All I know is, I’m focussing all of my positive energy in case it does.

Hopefully my next work update on Friday will be a positive one. Fingers crossed.

Orthodontists

I am so scared right now. I haven’t been to the orthodontist for over 10 years and now I’m here waiting to find out if I can get my “smile fixed.”

I’ve always been against paying for surgery like a nose job or a boob job, but I literally cannot imagine myself getting married in 10 years time with my protruding front tooth!

It’s bad enough having to look at it whilst I brush my teeth or take a selfie.

I could just leave it. Save spending around £4000 on my mouth. But if I could have a perfect smile, I think it will boost my confidence. Especially when I’m going for interviews now and I dread even opening my mouth.

Call it vanity or whatever, I really don’t care. I just can’t bear this anymore.

After Months, I’ve Finally…

LEFT MY JOB!

After months of battling morals and feeling smashing my head against my desk every now and then – I am finally free!

It sounds weird for a recent grad to be happy that they are once again in the rat race to find a job. But I swear, I feel this is a blessing in disguise.

Like I said before, I would rather be happy in a job than earn a good wage doing something I can’t enjoy.

Finally I have the time to focus on the goals I’ve set for myself, starting with: